On August 30, 2026 we gained a daughter. My son Jonah married Molly after eight years and one week of dating. I wrote about their engagement in “Operation Molly“. Today I’ll share the speech I gave at their wedding, a bit about the incredible rabbi that married them, and conclude with Mia Sarah’s speech and the bouquet story.
My Speech
I was told by the Wedding Politburo that I have only three minutes for this speech. At first I thought, asking a guy who writes books to compress his speech into three minutes is unreasonable. But then I felt somewhat empathetic toward the Politburo, as its members are still suffering from PTSD from my last speech, at Mia Sarah’s bat mitzvah, which was 50 minutes. Okay, I’ll keep this one to 40.
This speech has three parts: to Jonah, to Molly, and, as our friend Alon puts it, to the Katsoffs (a nice play on Katsenelson and Widoff).
Part 1. To Jonah.
When you were born, I remember standing in the hospital, looking at you through the glass, having two thoughts.
First, are Mom and I really your parents? Seriously, you looked like an alien with a long conehead.
Once I was convinced by your hospital bracelet that we were related, my second thought was, what is this alien going to be like when he grows up?
You exceeded all my expectations. I see how you treat everyone around you: your family, your friends, and Molly.
I remember when you were ten years old and about to win a chess tournament. You were playing your friend Kevin for first place. Kevin lost that game and was devastated. Despite winning, you told the judge that you had lost. Kevin got first place and you got second. Seeing you hold that second-place trophy was an incredible moment of parental pride.
That is kindness.
It was amazing to see you transform from a kid with a 1.3 GPA in 11th grade, the one who had a victim mentality, to an adult with a 3.9 GPA as a senior who took charge of his life.
Your graduating with honors from CU Boulder was impressive, but what really impressed me was how you did it. You showed both discipline and kindness. You tutored a lot of your friends, many of them here today. You elevated others.
You grew up into a very intentional person. I see a much-improved version of myself in you.
When you see a fence that everyone else obediently walks by, you don’t see it as an obstacle. You see someone else’s decisions. You ask if it should be there.
My favorite Jonah story has to do with the very hotel where we are today.
You were a student at CU Boulder. Your apartment was flooded and was being treated for mold. The landlord put all the kids up in a motel that made Motel 6 look like the Four Seasons.
You did not accept this.
You asked the landlord how much the insurance company was willing to pay per day. Then you went to the St. Julien, the fanciest hotel in Boulder, and offered to pay them what the insurance company was paying the landlord. It was half of what the St. Julien was charging, and thus they declined.
But you did not stop there. You asked, what if I stay for 30 days? They agreed.
But this is not my favorite part of the story.
When I came to visit you, I saw your Toyota SUV parked right next to the Ferraris and Lamborghinis.
I was surprised.
You said, well, this hotel doesn’t have street parking, only valet parking. I went to the valet guy and said, listen, I’ll be staying here for more than a month. I am just a student. I cannot tip you every time you bring me my car. How about this: I’ll park it up front, give you the key, and when I need to leave, I’ll pick up the key. You don’t need to do anything. The valet thought about his options and agreed. Jonah gave him a nice tip at the end of his month-long stay.
This is intentionality. Seeing the fence, acknowledging its presence, and moving it.
But the highest compliment I can give you is this: you are the embodiment of your Grandpa Naum, my gold standard of a role model. You are smart, thoughtful, intentional, and most important, you are kind.
Part 2. To Molly.
I remember the first time I met you. It was the pinnacle of Jonah’s high school football career, which lasted exactly one day.
As you told me later, you were nervous to meet me. But I showed up eating chicken wings from 7-Eleven, dripping in hot sauce. Dripping sauce made me less intimidating. I wish I could say it was intentional disarming. I was just hungry.
What I remember is meeting Jonah’s beautiful, quiet girlfriend, the one he was crazy about. Then I got to know you, and I saw that behind that reserved beauty there is a smart, thoughtful, considerate, strong, and kind human being.
I got to know your wonderful parents, Josh and Eddie. They have an obsession with helping others, and I can see how you turned out this way. You had incredible teachers.
I am very proud of how you left a very comfortable job, decided to challenge yourself, and went for a master’s degree in mental health counseling. You are elevating your new last name, Katsenelson.
But let me tell you your biggest achievement to date.
As much as Rachel and I want to take credit for Jonah’s transformation from a 1.3 GPA to a 3.9 GPA, the credit goes to you. You changed him. You made him rise to his potential without saying a single word, just by being you: his role model.
Molly, the part about you is shorter than Jonah’s, and it is completely your fault. You are every writer’s worst nightmare. You lack drama and an ugly duckling transformation. You were always perfect.
Welcome to the family.
Part 3. My message to Jonah and Molly.
Let’s be honest. This marriage is a bit of, a lot of, My Big Fat Greek Wedding. You cannot find bigger opposites than the loud Katsenelsons, who plan their European vacations and buy tickets five days ahead, and the quiet, measured Widoffs, who plan vacations a year ahead, dividing their itinerary into 15-minute increments.
Rachel may or may not try to convince you that the kosher lamb on your Shabbat dinner plate is a vegetarian dish. Eddie may or may not bring a bundt cake as a gift.
At least that is what you see on the surface.
But below this Big Fat Greek Wedding surface you find identical Jewish values: being students of life, intentional, a net positive to society, and kind.
Jonah and Molly, I don’t know if you noticed the word that is central here, the one I keep repeating: kind.
I have observed you guys for eight years. You are very kind and considerate toward each other. This is the only word you need to remember for your terrific relationship to prosper: continue to be kind to each other.
Mazel tov, and I love you both.
The Rabbi
Jonah and Molly were married by Rabbi Ray Zwerin. Rabbi Zwerin is 89 years old and has been retired for almost two decades. There are rabbis, and then there is Rabbi Zwerin. I respect him immensely, and not only for his accomplishments, which are many. He founded Temple Sinai, one of the most successful synagogues in Denver, which has been a significant net positive in the lives of thousands (Rachel and I were married there by him). He founded the Denver Jewish Day School, which all of my children have attended. He was the driving force behind the Babi Yar memorial in Denver, honoring the tens of thousands of Jews killed by Nazis in Kyiv. He established an organization that advocated for the immigration of Jews from the Soviet Union. And he founded and ran a successful publishing company. These are just the accomplishments I know about.
But I respect him most because, like my father, Rabbi Zwerin is an incredibly kind, multidimensional person and a lifelong learner, a student of life. Since retiring from Temple Sinai he has written two novels, edited his sermons into a book, and continues to write essays (you can read them here). Over the years, Rabbi and I became good friends. We go for a three-hour walk once a month.
Jonah and Molly met with the Rabbi several times before the wedding, and predictably, one-hour meetings turned into three-hour ones. These meetings were very special to them, and they wrote him a thank-you letter, which, with their permission, I’ll share with you here. I think you’ll find it worth your time.
Mia Sarah’s Speech
My 12-year-old daughter Mia Sarah gave this speech:
Jonah and Molly: Jonah, you are the best big brother I could ever ask for. Molly, I’ve known you all my life. I don’t know a life without you. I am so glad you said yes when Jonah asked you to marry him. Jonah and Molly, I would have said more. But Hannah [her older sister] used up all the ChatGPT tokens writing her speech. Mazel tov. I love you both.
The Bouquet
The wedding ended with… first, I have to give you context. My 20-year-old daughter Hannah recently got engaged to her high school sweetheart Lior. They are getting married sometime in 2027. My friends, most of whom have kids of similar ages, still unmarried, are connecting the dots between Jonah’s and Hannah’s engagements and have already started to make jokes about my youngest, Mia Sarah, getting married.
At the end of Jonah’s wedding, Molly turned her back to the crowd, ready to throw the bouquet. Mia Sarah joined the army of other unmarried young women. Rachel told her that this was for those who are ready to get married. Mia Sarah accepted that, at 12, she did not belong in this crowd and started to walk away. She was a good fifteen feet from the mob when Molly overthrew the bouquet. It sailed over the heads of all the single women desperate to catch it, and landed, of all places, in Mia Sarah’s hands.
My reaction: “We are locking you up.”
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